life with an ostomy. candid, not sugar-coated. empowered, not embarrassed.

Jun. 13, 2007

dead friend


my friend with an ostomy died recently. his brother sent out a notice by email, using Chris's account. i was shocked to read it, although he had been sick his whole life and was waiting for a double lung transplant in the time leading up to his death. his whole life was marked knowing that it could be over soon. he led an unusual life to say the least, between being a regular TV telethon face, to visits from hockey players at the Children's hospital, to trying to live like a normal kid in a suburban town, and keep a job, and cart an oxygen tank around sometimes.

through having an ostomy, i have come into contact with people - like Chris - who have lived unusual lives, with all kinds of health complications, and run-ins with hospital, needles, knives, drugs, walkathons, frustrations like missing big events because they too sick to go, pooping themselves, getting screwed by a negligent doctor, etc... and then we've all been able to meet up in the park or a coffee shop and laugh about it.

5 Comments:

Blogger Melanie said...

Hello My Pink Button!

Your blog is becoming an addiction for me! My spouse has an ostomy due to ulcerative colitis at the age of 25. (Side note: He was diagnosed with primary sclerosing cholangitis at the start of this year. He is 33.) Anywho, would you tell me what ostomy supplies you currently use? My husband never talks about his ostomy - never - but I know that his bags sometimes malfunction and can be painful. I wonder if there are newer bags (1 piece) he is not aware of that may work better? Secondly, you write very well! Quite impressive entries. Have you ever considered writing anything more extensive? a book? Many thanks ~Melanie

12:26 p.m., June 15, 2007

 
Blogger Diego said...

i'm glad to see that you still write occasionally!

1:39 p.m., August 11, 2007

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello,

Thanks for sharing. My friend just had his rectum removed due to Colon cancer. I'm trying to get an idea what he's goanna be facing shortly.

Always wonderful to find an open, frank, honest description. Pretty rare at times these days.

Thanks again. Good Luck,
Brent

7:41 p.m., August 24, 2007

 
Anonymous Kate said...

MPB,

I'm sorry to read about your friend, it sounds like he did indeed lead an unusual life, but a 'full' one. You were very lucky to know each other, and I'm sure you'll treasure his memory.

My Dad had a stoma-bag fitted when he went in for a biopsy and was diagnosed with Cancer. Trying to understand how he coped with this has been hard.

I have memories of moments when he was learning to cope with it and not quite managing. And the devastated look on his face.

Thanks for sharing your stories, and helping to remove the cloak that is drawn over this situation.

4:33 p.m., September 26, 2007

 
Blogger Stacy said...

I have just now decided to look for others on the internet that have gone through the "ostomy experience". I was afraid to inform myself prior to surgery. I am enjoying reading this blog. I was diagnosed with Crohn's at age 12 and had a distal ilium stoma placed last month at age 38. The way you are presenting your life is inspiring and entertaining. I have found that you have to look at this experience not only with compassion for yourself but with humor too. Life is a crazy, funny and amazing thing. I hope you plan to keep up your blog. As a single woman with an ostomy, don't ever feel guilty about needing or enjoying having someone love you for you; stoma and all. (If you look at the stress healthy women place on themselves to be beautiful...it's no wonder that having a poo bag would kind of fuck you up)...Thanks for the honesty.

11:20 a.m., January 03, 2011

 

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